I’ve tried writing this post a couple times now and I just don’t know how to start it. I can’t figure out how to convey to all of you, how much this means to me.
When I was 12 I got my first real job, working for a lady who made chocolates out of her house. I have no idea who she was, how I got hooked up with her, or even how long this whole arrangement lasted. What I do remember was sitting at her table while she taught me how to fill the molds and tap the air bubbles out, and I just thought it was so cool that she did this out of her house and was still earning money.
I remember vividly growing up and watching my mom make detailed character cakes for us with nothing but a toothpick and a butter knife. She didn’t have all of these fancy tips and bags like we have now, but they were wonderful and detailed and you knew exactly who the character was.
Then I grew up and suddenly it was time for my son’s first birthday party. I had waited and waited until the time I could decorate a theme cake and finally that time was now. Let’s just say it was a complete disaster and I made 3 cakes before one finally looked presentable. Since that day, I have been determined to figure out how to decorate a cake correctly.
I’ve shown all of you my cakes. The sweet comments you guys have left were more than just nice to read in the moment. They have stuck with me and I go back and read them often. See the thing is, I’ve had this dream for about 20 years now. Ever since I helped that lady make candy, and watched my mom work her magic in the kitchen.
I’ve always dreamed about owning my own bakery. I never thought it was much more than a dream. We aren’t the business-owning type. In fact, we aren’t risk-takers at all. We weigh small purchases carefully. We take a year to buy a TV. I don’t think I’ve ever paid more than $20 for a pair of jeans. On top of all that, I just never thought I could do it. I didn’t have enough confidence in my baking or cake decorating skills.
Today my dream is just a couple days away from becoming a reality!! I BOUGHT A BAKERY!!!
I can barely comprehend that that is me saying that!!
I’m not exaggerating in the slightest when I say that this wasn’t even on my radar 3 weeks ago. Then I got a random email one Monday morning that set this whole thing in motion and starting Aug. 15th, this will be mine!!
I’m scared to death right now. I’m scared this will disrupt the wonderful schedule we’ve got going in our little family. I’m scared I will crumble and fail. I’m scared people won’t like what I bake. I’m scared nobody will show up.
Behind those feelings of self-doubt, though is a feeling of excitement! I’m ready!! I AM READY FOR THIS!! I have been planning and preparing for this in my head for years. I know this is the time to go for it. The opportunity that is being presented to me, is not one that comes along often at all and this is my chance to prove to myself that I’ve got what it takes.
The day for me to bloom is now. Two weeks ago my husband and I had a serious talk about whether this was a good idea or not, and he said I didn’t have much of a choice. If I didn’t try it, I would always regret not taking this risk.
One of my favorite quotes has been playing constantly through my head for the last 2 weeks:
“But what happens if you can?”